Thanksgiving or giving thanks....

What a wonderful week to gather together with your family and/or friends. Although this is one year that we will NOT be gathering with anyone on the actual Thursday feast.We had Thanksgiving on Saturday so that we could enjoy Zachary's company while he was here. That was perfect for me. Both sets of parents were there, aunts, uncles and cousins. It was not as large as it usually is because people have lives. Zach needed it and we did it just for him. My mother in law (Carolyn) makes the BEST dressing in the world! It is perfect texture, perfect taste and just right! I love her dressing. Growing up, I had stuffing, and never knew the difference. I was deprived! HAHA! Growing up, I never had stuffing because it was very gummy and doughy. Carolyn's is cornbread based and does have bread, but small amounts. It is just good!
There are so many things I am thankful for, most of them being things I daily thank God...

I Am Thankful for...

• My husband who I love more than the air I breathe. Marriage is a tough job, but I wouldn't change it for the world. My husband has been with me through hard times and good times. He is a wonderful father and wonderful man. He loves me unconditionally. Meeting him when I was 15 years old, and dating on & off for 4 years and now being married for 21 years with 2 beautiful boys.
  
• My mother, who as a very young lady was saddled with the task of raising her small children and with no education, struggled and pushed and made her way through nursing school while working full time and raising us. She is a very compassionate and strong person and I love her so much! She has accomplished so much, but never dated until after her kids were grown. My other mother (mother in law), who has been there the last 22 years as a huge supported to me. She is one of the kindest women you will ever meet. She has such incredible love for her family and I love to hear the stories of her youth. I could not love her more if I had been born to her naturally instead of through marriage. I am thankful we don't have the typical "in-law" syndrome. Although we have had our moments and said things to hurt each other, I love her dearly.
• My grandfather and grandmother. My grandfather was a quiet presence in our home, a strong presence but he worked long hours at construction and the evenings were his wind down time. My grandparents took a very active role in their grandchildren. It is because of my experience growing up with them that made me decide to not place them as guardians over my children if something should ever happen to my husband and myself. I didn't have the same relationship that the other grandchildren did. My grandparents gave of themselves daily, and gave up so much of the life they could have had by traveling and spending time with just each other.Instead they begrudgingly took care of their grandkids and kids that needed them. And they were far from perfect, but did their best to teach us what God had instructed, from their experiences, good and bad. I love them so much and miss grandma every day!
• My two dads. Now since my birth father chose the non-responsible life all together, I have strong issues with men my father's age, 65+. I love my father in law and step father and wish I had a daddy growing up. Both of these men of which have earned the title of "dad" to me, I believe would go to the ends of the earth if I needed them to. I tend to keep my distance and even over the many years they have been a part of my life, I couldn't love them more than I do. They sense my resistance but would be there for anything and love my children unconditionally! What more could a girl ask for?
• My children, Zachary and Brayden. The only two I was able to carry to term, Zachary arrived two weeks late and Brayden arrived two weeks early, totally different births and totally different children. I lost three pregnancies, but believe that was God's will. And to think I could've had 5 children. What a wonderful thing that would be! I am so proud of my two boys and thank the Lord every day for giving me this many days with them.
• All of my family and extended family. It would take forever to write on all of them! Marcy, Lisa & I all grew up to be close, as close as sisters and I love them both so much and miss seeing them more often. My aunts and uncles always tried to fill the void my father left. I miss the family of my childhood that spent every holiday together.
•  My church family. I have been so blessed to be part of many church families. Mesquite CoC, Broadway (Centerville) CoC and now Johnson Street CoC. We settled in Greenville mainly because of our love for this church family and the outstanding preacher (Randy Daw) that always feeds our souls and makes us strive to better followers of Christ. We now have an exceptional youth minister (Brandon Watson) who has encouraged our youth to be servants and teaches them by example. 

This Thanksgiving I am thankful for the blessings in my life. Those I love around me. I am thankful for a job I love, co-workers that I look forward to seeing every day, a roof over my head and more than I need, for my husband and children and foster children and family, friends and to live in America. Amidst,  cars on fire and trucks that won't start and children moving out of state, I am a survivor and I may bend but I will NOT be broken. I will conquer my demons with the help of others, others of my choosing, that I trust, because trust is essential to healing and moving past this multi-year demon. I am grateful that my heart is open to love and never seems to have a lack of space. Sometimes it hurts, and sometimes it grows, but it is all good.